Silly Girl...Junk Food Is for Humans

Over 15 years ago, I found out from a naturopathic physician that I had gluten intolerance. Before then, I'd been sick my entire life. I didn't know what it was like to not have stomach pain, body aches, a constantly stuffy or runny nose, and extreme brain fog.

Once I fully understood what eating the wrong foods or foods one is intolerant to had such a profound effect on health, I changed not only my diet but my entire lifestyle.

In addition to celiac disease (or non-celiac gluten sensitivity), I'll never really know which one it is, I also have diverticulosis. So, to say I have pretty crappy digestion is an understatement. Still in my 20s, I developed some serious wisdom when it came to food, diet, health, lifestyle, etc.

I was vigilant about what I put in and on my body for many people to believe I had some sort of paranoid disorder. The truth is, I DO have OCD, but this was different. Like I mentioned in my first post, cancer runs absolutely rampant in my family. It's ridiculous.

Knowing I had autoimmune disease and terrible genetics, I KNEW I had to eat as healthily as possible to beat the odds of getting cancer or another very serious and potentially deadly disease.

By my late 20s, I was totally on top of my game when it came to diet, exercise, etc. I even started my own blog 10 years ago to write about what I had learned and discovered and share it with the world.

Sadly, that blog is...well, missing for the time being because I accidentally deleted it like a fool. Ugh! It's been a rough year, and it's only March.

Anyway, back to my point.

In 2014, I had a nervous breakdown, and I spent 5 weeks in the psychiatric ward of a hospital, barely clinging to sanity. I was given medication and eventually sent home about as steady and stable as a 3-legged drunk moose, but I was alive. (Sort of?)

From Paranoia to Binge Mode

I'm autistic, so the entire world is pretty much black and white to me, as is everything I do. I'm either all in or all out, and there is no in-between. Unfortunately, the same went for when I was eating a very healthy diet to when I was eating an incredibly poor one.

About 3 years ago, I changed in some critical way. My mental health felt like it was improving, and I felt happier, full of confidence, less anxious, etc. And, all of a sudden, my very strict eating habits went right out the window.

I was like a type I diabetic who'd just experienced a miracle cure overnight. I couldn't PUT enough gluten-free cookies, cakes, brownies, and pie in my mouth. I gained 30 freaking pounds! I'm truly surprised I didn't literally give myself diabetes (that also runs in my family).

I'm sure I did an absolute number on my metabolism in the process. I don't know what happened. I couldn't tell you. I went from one extreme to another, which is what I tend to do. That's just how my brain is wired.

Had I not done that, I don't think I would have stage II breast cancer right now. I know a lot of people say that diet has nothing to do with cancer. That it's genetics and only genetics.

BULLSHIT.

Yep. That's what I said. Bullshit. Genetics does have a lot to do with it, but it's not the whole picture. More and more research is turning up that actually shows that cancer is a metabolic disease. 

In my case, my terrible genetics combined with my autoimmune disease, combined with a 3-year binge-fest on the worst foods I could have chugged down my throat, and boom, a bomb exploded, and now I have cancer. 

Would I have ended up with it anyway? Maybe. Possibly. I can't say for sure, but I know damn well that I didn't help myself any by doing what I did. 

Am I angry at myself? You bet I am! I KNEW better. I used to teach people how to put autoimmune disease into remission, and now I'm having to learn it all over again like I had some sort of accident that caused amnesia. 

Jaime, what the HELL!?

Back to Wisdom

That's what I titled this post the way I did. I don't think junk food by itself causes cancer, diabetes, autoimmune disease, etc...but with my body being the way it is, and my health being the way it is, I should NOT have done what I did. It was a terrible gamble, and I lost...big time. 

I mean, I know I'm technically human, but being autistic, I've never felt exactly from this planet, and I've always been painfully delicate and sensitive both emotionally and physically. What other people can do to their bodies and minds before having anything break down is just not something I can duplicate. 

Like I said to my mom the other day, "People with chronic illness are the canaries in the coal mine." It takes absolutely nothing to upset the balance for us, and we are the ones who experience the direct physical and emotional results of living on a planet filled with toxic chemicals, food, and air. It doesn't happen over 10, 20, 30 years for us, it happens right away!

So, in between bouts of being incredibly mad at myself for chucking my own wisdom out the window because I managed to convince myself that I had been being "paranoid" about my diet this entire time, I'm going back to the way I was. 

I'm completely avoiding sugar, juicing, taking supplements, fasting, reading, researching, meditating, and re-learning how to be what I've always been: The healthiest sick person you'll ever meet. 

I just finished a phenomenal book called "How to Starve Cancer" by Jane McLelland. (Yes, that's an affiliate link.) Unlike other books about natural treatments for cancer, Jane advises using chemotherapy and other conventional approaches to bringing the body back into a state of balance and health while also using supplements, off-label drugs, exercise, and dietary changes. 

It's an amazing read, and I highly recommend it.

The sad thing is, I knew about 50% of what I'd read already in the book, but, somehow, I got careless, and here we are. At 40 years old, I'm starting from square one, and I never plan to go against my instincts again.